MURPHY’S LAWS FOR COPS
Current mood: cooky/wacky
Category: Jobs, Work, Careers


1. You are NOT a superhero

2. The bigger they are, the harder they fall. They also punch, kick, bite and choke harder.

3. Always remember that your equipment was purchased from the lowest bidder.

4. Never share a patrol car with someone who is braver than you are.

5. Bullet proof vests aren't.

6. Try not to look important. The bad guys may be low on ammo.

7. The important things are always simple, the simple things are always hard
and the easy way is always a trap.

8. Just because you have a weapon doesn't mean you're a warrior.

9. Incoming fire has the right of way.

10. If its stupid, but it works, then it ain't stupid.

11. Old patrol cars never die, they get assigned to you.

12. If the bad guys are in range, SO ARE YOU!!!!

13. Friendly advice, isn't.

14. Equipment that has to be PUT together to work usually can't be carried together.

15. Radios always work, that is, until the proverbial feces hits the fan.

16. There is only one thing more accurate than being shot at by a bad guy in the dark. That one thing is; being shot at in the dark by your fellow officers.

17. Surveillance works both ways.

18. Anything that you do can get you hurt, including doing nothing at all.

19. WARNING: The light at the end of the tunnel may be a muzzle flash!!!

20.The better you do your job the more likely you are to be; shot, sued, subpoenaed, injured or fired on your day off.

21. A bad guy with a AK-47 is a better shot than an officer with a handgun.

22. It is not necessary to stop running before spraying your pepper spray, but, it is highly recommended. (Thanks Deputy Wheeler for that one!!! LOL)

23. You may know where you are. God may know where you are, but if your dispatcher doesn't know where you are, you and God better be on pretty good terms.

24 The bad guy can see your night sights too, especially when he's looking over your shoulder. (Contributed by Officer Taylor-MPD)

25 Whatever you are about to do, if there is a good chance it will get you killed, you probably shouldn't do it.

26. Bullets work on veteran officers too. They also work on martial arts experts, body builders, swat jocks, detectives, supervisors, drug task force officers and others who may consider themselves immortal.

27. To a dog, a Badge does not represent a person of authority. It represents lunch.

28. Even when youre not on call, you are on call, just ask the SGT who doesn't want to be called.

29 For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.

30. Yes, there ARE things that go bump in the night. (Stay in this job for more than a week and you'll meet the people that make things go bump in the night.)

31. Patrol cars only break down when you are outside your district.

32. To err is to be human. To forgive is against department policy.

33. If you know someone who tortures small animals, plays with matches and wets the bed, he is either a serial killer or he works for internal affairs.

34. You can never go fast enough to please someone who needs your assistance and you can never go slow enough to please someone who doesn't.

35. Murphy was a cop.