1) It was the best of times, it was the worst of times ...

2) The names contained in this report have been changed to protect the innocent ...

3) The Director/ Mayor then made an illegal left hand turn onto John R street at which point I opened fire ...

4) Before I get into the details, I've got a few "shout-outs" for my homeys in the command staff ...

5) It was so dark and wet that night you could almost eat the mist. The radio call penetrated the eerie silence with such piercing intensity that for a moment, I was sure I'd lost my mind ...

6) Got call. Responded. Arrested bad guy. The end.

7) Mye pertnar an eye wher on petrol wen we seen a man act suspishushly...

8) The suspect then tried to assault me by repeatedly slamming his face into my fist ...

9) A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away ...

10) At or about 1338 hours on 07-22-91, reporting officer XXXXX was dispatched to the blue information desk, to meet complainant XXXXXX, who stated that his vehicle had been damaged in the parking lot by person(s) unknown while he was at an appointment in the V.A.. But the mother f**ker was lying, so I left. End report.